Psychopath Strawberry

Psychopath Strawberry

Mom was a scientist who became ill.

While she was ill, a fellow scientist, Larry, made a toxic fume as he tried to develop a cure for cancer. The toxic fume drove him and the other scientists in the lab crazy.

Now, the scientists wanted to develop ways of hurting people!

“We’re going to get rich!” said Larry during a conference call I overhead him having with Mom. “Get well and get back here as soon as you can, so you can help us screw up the world.”

The plan was to sell a batch of ice cream that tasted great but made everyone who ate it crazy, too.

It was all wrong.

“You’ve got to stop him,” Mom said to me.

She was in bed with the flu.

“How?” I said.

She coughed up mucous, sneezed, and blew her nose in a tissue.

“Here, take this,” she said, handing me the dirty tissue. “Spread my snot around the lab. Then, steal a sample of the toxic fume. Bring it to me. I’ll take it from there.”

“Okay,” I said, wondering what she was thinking.

I put on Mom’s dress and sunglasses. I fixed up my hair. I grabbed her lab badge off the night stand and looked at myself in the mirror.

“You’re my spitting image,” she said with a snotty laugh. “Good luck, dear.”

*

I ditched my bike outside the lab and flashed her badge at a security guard.

“Welcome back, Dolores,” said a tall man with a weird grin. “How are you feeling?”

I looked at his name tag. It was Larry.

“Better,” I said. “I just need … some coffee to perk me up.”

“We have a fresh pot brewing in the break room,” he said, pointing that way. “Grab a cup, then meet me in my office. I want to tell you about our new line of ice cream. We’re going to call it Psychopath Strawberry!”

“Cool name,” I said. “I’m sure a lot of people will like it.”

“That’s the idea,” Larry said.

In the break room, I put Mom’s snot into the pot of coffee. I also rubbed it along the rims of clean cups.

I filled one of the cups with coffee and started roaming around the lab with a weird grin on my face like the other mad scientists. Everyone seemed happy to see me.

“Sick!” I overheard someone say. “Our star has returned! Now we’ll really wreak havoc in the world!”

Finally, I found a sample of the toxic fume. I stuffed it into my lab coat.

It was time to get away from this creepy place.

I turned a corner in the hallway. Larry blocked my path.

“Aren’t you forgetting something?” he said with his weird grin.

I had to think fast.

“Yes,” I said, handing him the cup of coffee. “This is for you. I have to go home. Now my daughter has the flu! Good luck selling your insane ice cream. You should add cashews, to make it nuttier.”

“Great idea!” Larry said with a wild laugh. “I love the way you think! Maybe you should take a batch of Psychopath Strawberry home to your daughter. It might make her feel better …”

“Another time, maybe,” I said. “Gotta run!”

*

At home, Mom felt better.

“I’m so glad you returned safe,” she said, hugging me. “How’d it go?”

I gave her the sample.

“Perfect,” she said, stuffing it into her purse. “Tomorrow, at work, I know just what to do …”

*

The next day, Mom called me from the lab. I was stuck at home, sick with the flu.

So were the other scientists. Everyone called in sick, except her.

“Thanks to you spreading my germs around here, I’ve had peace and quiet and time to figure out a cure for the toxic fume,” she said. “I poured the cure into the air vents. My fellow scientists will return to work and be back to their old selves soon. Psychopath Strawberry will be like a bad dream that never happened.”

“I’m so happy to hear it,” I said from bed. “Are you and the other scientists going to keep trying to cure cancer?”

“Of course, but first I’m coming home, to cure you,” Mom said. “Would you like me to bring you some ice cream?”

I laughed.

“Sure,” I said. “Just nothing with strawberries, or nuts.”

“Deal.”

Chapter 4: Uncle Jake’s Visit

 

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Jack and Ryan were concerned because Uncle Jake was coming to visit, and they didn’t want Doom Clown to ruin their fun with him.

There was a knock on the door.

“Hey, kids, guess who?”

It was Uncle Jake!

Behind the door, Doom Clown stood with a knife, ready to surprise him.

Jack opened the door, and the two brothers quickly dragged Jake through the living room into their bedroom closet.

“Well, I’m glad to see you guys, too, but you hurt my arm … and how about a hug? And what’s with all the secrecy?”

“Shush!” Jack said. “Sorry about the arm, and here’s a hug.”

Both boys embraced their uncle.

“But we’ve got a problem,” Ryan said. “There’s a homicidal clown running around the house, and we need you to help us stop him!”

At that moment, there was a scream.

Autumn, the boys’ little sister, was in trouble. Or so they thought.

They ran to her bedroom and found Doom Clown, seated at her bureau, screaming like a girl.

Autumn was putting makeup on him, making him look like a princess.

Doom Clown looked pretty. And terrified.

“Now’s our chance!” Jack said. “Go for it, Uncle!”

Jake hesitated.

“Well, this isn’t really my style, but she is kind of cute … hey, lady, are you single?”

“What?” Ryan said. “This ain’t no time for shenanigans … Get him!”

“That’s a HIM?” Jake said.

“Yes, and he’s a maniac!” Jack said. “Stop him!”

“Fat chance, suckers!” Doom Clown said.

He pressed a button on his watch and disappeared in a cloud of smoke.

“Oh, no, he escaped!” Ryan said.

“Ha, ha, ha!” Doom Clown said.

But when the smoke cleared, they realized he hadn’t escaped at all.

He was stuck. In the mirror.

“Oh, no!” said Doom Clown. “I must have pressed the wrong button on this darn watch …”

“Lucky us,” Jake said. “Looks like we get the last laugh, after all.”

“Maybe, this time,” said Doom Clown.

The mirror swirled in smoke and his face faded in the darkness.

“But I’ll be back … I’LL BE BACK!”

Chapter 3: The Biggest Regret

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A boy named Ryan climbed into the attic, his favorite place. On a shelf, Ryan saw a book called, Doom Clown: The Worst Joker.

“Read me,” said a voice coming from the book.

“I’m not sure that’s a good idea.”

“If you say ‘Doom Clown’ three times, I will be free and yours to read and make you laugh foreverrrr and everrrr.”

Ryan ran downstairs to his brother Jack’s bedroom to tell him what happened.

Jack said, “I bet that clown’s not very funny. Say his name three times, and let’s see what happens.”

Ryan said, “No, you!”

“Fine, scaredy cat,” Jack said, and he repeated ‘Doom Clown’ three times.

They heard a thump in the attic, and then a scratch on the door.

Jack opened the door, and there was Doom Clown, with a scary smile.

“Thanks, little boys!” he said. “Come closer, and give me a hug!”

Jack and Ryan screamed and ran.

Chapter 1: Doom Clown Lives

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Once there was a Good Clown who entertained boys and girls at birthday parties, but deep down he had a bad side. One day while looking himself in the mirror, Good Clown accidentally summoned the monster in himself.

The monster was Doom Clown, and he said, “How you doing, old friend?! You wanna play?”

Good Clown said, “No?!”

But Doom Clown refused to be turned down.

“Let’s play anyway!” Doom Clown said, and he tossed Good Clown into the closet and locked him in there, or so he thought.

Then Doom Clown went to a birthday party. He said to the kids, “Time to die!”

He started running after them, trying to fart on their heads so their heads would pop off, because his farts were so gross.

Then Doom Clown had to pee, so he went to the bathroom. Good Clown used the opportunity to take control again.

“I am good, l am good, l am good!” said the face in the mirror.

Then Doom Clown got stuck in the mirror.

The end.

Maybe.